Relationship advice: 9 Relationship mistakes to avoid
Once you’ve past the initial dating stage you enter the ‘relationship’ phase. In the dating phase, you were still a little wary of one another, still testing each other out a bit, so you were careful, but in the relationship phase, you feel more at ease, so you relax and let go a little more and this is when some common mistakes can be made. Every relationship will have its highs and its lows, but to help you avoid some of the lows, here are a few of the traps that many couples fall into:
1. Falling into a routine
When couples are together for a long time it’s easy to fall into the same routine day in and day out. At first, having a routine feels nice and it feels comfortable, but, after a while it can become plain boring. To avoid the routine becoming a rut, don’t stop trying new things together. Go out to places you’ve never been before and don’t stop dating.
2. Trying to change your partner
One of the classic relationship mistakes that people make is that they think they can change a person. Everyone who is in a relationship has to learn to compromise a little, but if you try to force a person to change who they really are, then they will begin to resent it and start to feel that you don’t love them for what they are; only what you think that you can make them.
3. Taking your partner for granted
It’s easy to do, particularly in a long term relationship: you’re so comfortable with one another that you forget to let your partner know it. Try to remember all the nice and kind things that you used to do for one another, like simply saying ‘I love you’ or bringing home a small gift. Just because you’ve been together for a while, doesn’t mean these small gestures are any less important.
4. Not talking about money
The number one issue cited in divorce cases is disputes over money. It’s important to be able to discuss money honestly and openly and have no money secrets. Even if you think you’re being kind by keeping a money problem from your partner, so that they don’t have to worry about it, they won’t thank you for it in the long run.
5. Assuming that your partner can read your mind
It’s a quaint picture to think of a couple that are so close that they read each other’s minds, but, that doesn’t really happen, does it? Communication is the key in a relationship and if you don’t tell your partner what’s worrying you or upsetting you, how will they ever know?
6. Keeping secrets
You don’t need to tell someone else every single, minor little thing that happens in your life, but when you are keeping something important from your partner, you know it’s important because you feel guilty about it. Honesty is the best policy, as secrets have a nasty habit of coming out at the end and then, they hurt even more.
7. Letting go of the romance
Just because you’ve been together for a while doesn’t mean that you have to stop being romantic. OK, so you’re not love-sick kids anymore, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t just remind your partner that you still love them. The reality is that relationships don’t just work by themselves; they need a little effort, so take some time and do something romantic for your partner tonight.
8. Have an emotional affair
You might think that an affair without physical contact would be easier to forgive, than an affair with it, but you’d be wrong. No affair is easy to get over, but, arguably, a casual encounter with no deep feelings is easier to forgive (for some people), than a deep emotional affair. If you have a problem in your relationship, don’t be tempted to seek the shoulder of someone of the opposite gender to cry on, they may take advantage; far better to discuss it with your partner and see if you can resolve things first.
Sometimes relationships need work and often that work is hard work, but, anything in life that has any real value is worth working for.
I hope you find this relationship advice useful.
What other relationship mistakes should we all avoid? Feel free to share your relationship tips in the comment section below.
Stay happy, love and be loved!