How To Spot Relationship Red Flags Right From The Start?
Many of us have more than one relationship in life, especially in our younger years. You’d think, then, that we’d get better at spotting relationship red flags. However, it’s not always so easy. To help you out, Beauty and Tips takes a look at how to spot a relationship red flag right from the start.
Some guys should come with a warning. When we go on a first date with them, they should wear t-shirts that read “RED FLAG” that helpfully lets us know we should tread carefully around them and not get in too deep, too quickly!
“Hey! I’m a red flag! Wanna get to know me?!”
Um. No …
Unfortunately, they don’t. Instead, they let us date them, drawing us in with their chatter, until we eventually realise that this dude is just no good for us.
And yet again, we’ve wasted our precious time.
If only we could read the situation early on, and recognise red flags before we get too heavily involved in a relationship!
Well, actually, you can. Guys – though they may very well be from Mars – have a series of tells (or giveaways) that act as warning signs, letting us know as soon as possible that they spell danger. It’s essential that you know what these are, so that you can make a sound judgement whether to stick or twist before you waste any more time.
Let’s take a look at how to spot relationship red flags right from the start.
Of course, he talks to you. It’s just that he isn’t prepared to talk about the things that really matter. He doesn’t want to talk about the future, he won’t work things out whenever you have an argument, and he never seems to say what’s on his mind.
All these are big deals. If a guy can’t broach trickier subjects, it shows that he just isn’t mature enough to have a serious relationship that could actually go somewhere. He wants to keep chilling, he doesn’t want any hassle, and he doesn’t want to get roped into making a big commitment. And this should all serve as a massive red flag.
Well, he may as well just stick a red flag in your garden!
If a man leaves you hanging emotionally right from the start, and keeps putting off serious conversations because “we’re having too much fun,” consider it a warning.
He’s Lied To You
If you’ve only been dating for a very short while and he’s already lied to you, you’ve gotta take this seriously. If he’s already lied to you – even just once – it’s a HUGE sign that he can’t be trusted. He’s got secrets, and he’s clearly prepared to be dishonest with you.
In fact, honesty doesn’t mean anything to him. And if it doesn’t, you have to wonder what else he’s keeping from you.
You might argue to yourself that he only told one lie, and that we all make mistakes. But at least take his lie(s) as a red flag and be on your guard from now on. Okay?
Your Friends And Family Aren’t Sure About Him
Far too many of us ignore the advice of our friends and family, when it comes to our partners. If our friends don’t like him, we assume it’s because they’re jealous and don’t want to see us happy.
But these are your friends. More often than not, they’ve got your best interests at heart.
Moreover, a friend often sees the bigger picture better than ourselves. So madly infatuated, we can’t see what’s really going on.
If your friends have reservations about your new man, take them seriously. Listen to their concerns. It’s almost always a red flag that you need to consider.
He Doesn’t Like Your Friends
Whenever your friends aren’t sure about a guy, it often follows that your partner isn’t sure about them either.
He might even go as far as to say that he doesn’t like your friends, and that you should stop hanging out with them.
If your man says something along these lines, you should be automatically on your guard. The right guys are able to get along with your family and friends. The wrong guys don’t even want to try to get on with them. Their only concern is to control you to the extent where he becomes your only friend.
Watch out for this kind of controlling behaviour. Try to spot it as soon as possible before it’s too late.
He’s Irresponsible And Unpredictable
He turns up late, disappears, and can’t manage his finances. Maybe he has debts, a line of failed jobs and relationships, and doesn’t want to take responsibility for anything. And maybe you never quite know where he’s going to be.
Does this all sound exciting? Or does it sound like a major headache?
We reckon the latter. And it won’t change.
Evasive About Past Relationships
We all know why a previous relationship ended. We spent some time reflecting on it, and we know where it went wrong.
If, however, the new man in your life can’t pinpoint where his past relationship(s) went wrong, it’s another red flag.
Or maybe it’s that he doesn’t want to pinpoint where it went wrong. Maybe he doesn’t want to take responsibility for his errors. Maybe he’s too immature to be an adult about this, and admit where the mistakes were.
If so, consider it a warning. If he hasn’t been able to resolve past relationships like an adult, it doesn’t exactly bode well for your future together.
There Is No Clear Direction On Where This Relationship Is Heading
Women especially want clarity on where a relationship is going. Even in its early stages we want to see that it has purpose and a direction.
If you’re insecure and even anxious and feel as though you’re walking on shaky ground, it’s another warning sign that this relationship might be doomed from the start.
If a guy can’t offer any clear assurances as to where this relationship is going from the start, will he ever? Is it a sign that he’s just here for a bit of fun before moving on? Very possibly.
Do you know other relationship red flags?