How To Keep A Conversation Going Naturally?
Tired of killing conversations? Annoyed that you really seem to be getting somewhere with a guy when, all of a sudden, the conversation yet again enters a silent period?
“So! What’s your favourite colour?”
“This conversation ended 10 minutes ago. BYE.”
In this article, Beauty and Tips clues you in on the secrets and tips on how to keep a conversation going.
Unless you’re a pro, keeping a conversation going can be kinda tricky. You know what it’s like: You’re on a first date, the conversation has been flowing, when all of a sudden it peaks, troughs, and dies. The last thing you guys talked about ran its course, and you literally have no idea what to say next.
Then, you both establish eye contact with each other during the silence, smile awkwardly, and shuffle in your seats.
But hey, it happens. Conversations hit lulls, they die – especially when we don’t know the other person too well. If you’re not a master with words or have never really taken charge of a conversation before, it can be hard to keep it going. But you’re here to learn. So let’s take a look at how to keep a conversation going naturally.
Don’t Check Yourself
How many times have you been talking to someone and checked yourself before speaking, afraid you’ll say something dumb?
“I could say that, but that would be stupid, right?”
Or maybe you really had something interesting to say but, again struck by an attack of self-consciousness, you filtered it so that only a bit of it came out. You kept the rest of it to yourself. If you approach a conversation like this, you’re selling yourself and the other person short. There is so much you could be saying, but you’re keeping yourself in check.
It’s okay to say whatever you want! People actually appreciate that. It gives the conversation energy, and helps to keep it moving along. Don’t keep things to yourself – air it!
Resurrect An Old Topic
So the current conversation has died. Rats. But then you remember a topic you were talking about earlier that hadn’t ran its course. Great! One of great tips on how to keep a conversation going is to resurrect an old topic.
Often, we go through topics so fast that we don’t actually let some of them run their course. We move on too quickly without covering everything we could have. If there was something interesting they mentioned earlier in the conversation, resurrect it by saying something like, “oh, you were saying something about how you’d like to live in California? I forgot to say that …”
Ask The Other Person To Elaborate
Sometimes, a conversation can flatline when the other person says something brief but interesting, and we fail to ask them to elaborate.
“My favourite animal is a sloth.”
This is a great opportunity to ask them to elaborate, it’s one of amazing tips on how to keep a conversation going. Ask them why it’s their favourite animal, or maybe ask them to tell you a bit about the sloth.
Sometimes you don’t even need to ask them a question. You could gently nudge them to elaborate by saying something like, “Interesting. I’ve never heard of a sloth before …” Just make sure that you take an interest in what the other person is saying by asking questions, or showing more signs of a reaction than just “Oh, that’s cool!”
Make An Observation
There are things happening all around you all the time. So why not take a look around you, comment on something that interests you, and make a conversation out of it? This is really easy to do, and it’s another good tip on how to keep a conversation going. It looks totally natural, and can lead to an interesting topic. Maybe you could comment on the weather, the people, the coffee you’re drinking and so on. There will always be something to talk about.
Play A Game
Who doesn’t love a fun game?
If the conversation looks like it’s about to die and you literally can’t think of any topics that would save it, suggest instead that you guys play a game. A fun game like “Would You Rather?” works really well here. It will breathe new life into the conversation and it’s a good tip on how to keep a conversation going. Moreover, the answers will likely be so funny that they’ll provide even more fuel for the conversation.
Bring Some Topics With You
Meeting someone armed with topics for the conversation ahead sounds really goofy, but it can save you from any of those dreadful lulls where neither of you can think of anything else to say.
There is a fine line between preparing possible topics beforehand that enables you to keep a conversation going naturally – and jumping from topic to topic artificially. So you need to be careful about how you make the transition from one topic to another. Just try not to make it look too forced, and try not to make it look really obvious that you pre-planned all this.
(and definitely don’t take your notepad out of your bag and pick a topic you wrote down)
Bring Up Something That You Both Relate To
“So what was the deal with Game of Thrones last night?”
“Oh I know.”
A lot of the time, we get so obsessed with not knowing how to keep a conversation going that we forget to keep it simple by talking about something that we both relate to.
There will be topics that you both have ties to, from TV shows to other friends you have in common. Instead of scratching around for something high-brow and in-depth to talk about, dip into the pool of common interests you have. All it takes is a brief comment like the example above and you’re away.
Ask Good Questions
People love it when we ask them questions, especially about themselves. So ask questions! However, it’s not enough that you ask any old question – you need to ask good questions. Maybe you could prepare some the evening before so that you’re not at a loss for something to ask.
Do you have other tips on how to keep a conversation going?