9 Best kept secrets of highly happy couples
There is nothing quite so touching as to see an elderly couple sitting on a park bench, hands held tenderly together. You can’t help but ask yourself: “How on earth do they do it? They’ve probably been together for years, had children, now got grandchildren, been through all the ups downs that a relationship can bring and they’re still in love? How does that work?!…”
Most of us probably yearn to, one day, be that loving couple, so here are a few of their best kept secrets to set you on your way:
1. Happy couples do things together
It seems to be a bit of a statement of the obvious: they’re a couple, what else would they do? But it’s an easy trap to fall into – to suddenly find yourselves doing most things apart. You do the shopping – he goes to the bar with his friends, you go to a girl’s night out – he works late and, before you know it, the only time you’re together is when you’re asleep in bed. Successful, long term, happy couples do things together, because they want to. He may detest shopping, but he still comes along, just for your company.
2. They don’t go to bed on an argument
Every couple has their disagreements but the successful couples don’t let those arguments fester. Bringing an argument to a close, even if it’s just by agreeing to disagree, gets it out of the way, so that you can move on; a good time for closure is before you go to bed, otherwise the bad feeling will still be there in the morning.
3. Happy couples learn to love one another’s flaws
When you really love a person, you love them for who they are, not for what you think you can make them be. Learning to love a person’s annoying little character traits, as much as you do their good ones is all part of learning to live happily together.
4. They still go on dates
You’re never too old to date. OK, so night clubs might be out, when you get a bit older, but you can still do things together. Keeping the dating habits alive, throughout a relationship, means that you make sure that you put aside time just for the two of you to be together and enjoy each other’s company. Dating and romance are very important ingredients of a happy relationship.
5. Happy couples appreciate what they have
Partners in mature and happy relationships tend to look far more at what they do have, rather than yearn for what they don’t have. So, even if your man’s not Brad Pitt, at least, he’s yours!
6. They understand the boundaries
You don’t need a written, contractually binding rule book, but couples who know the boundaries of a relationship stay together longer. Knowing and accepting what you can and cannot do or say, stops a lot of bad feeling.
7. Happy couples know how to make and to accept an apology
Everyone makes mistakes and, in a long term relationship, you’re going to make a few. Putting your pride to one side and admitting that you were wrong will heal a rift quickly, but be equally prepared to accept an apology in return as well.
8. They communicate
The importance of talking in any type of relationship, short or long term, cannot be over stressed. If you don’t tell your man you’re feeling unwell, how does he know that you’re not just being miserable? If you don’t tell him that you need some help with the chores, how will he know? From the important issues through to the more mundane, communication is the key!
9. Happy couples don’t stop showing each other that they care
The longer you are with a person, the easier it becomes for you to forget to tell them that you care. Don’t take your relationship for granted, tell your partner that your love and care for them!
We can’t all be starry eyed lovers all of the time; keeping a relationship strong for years takes a bit of effort and quite a lot of compromise. But, if you love someone, it’s worth it.
I hope you find this relationship advice useful.
If you know some other best kept secrets of highly happy couples feel free to share your knowledge and relationship tips in the comment section below.