10 Lessons you can learn from your ex-boyfriends
Breakups are never easy, but once the dust has settled and you are beginning to get over it, you can learn a lot from the experience. So, don’t think of an ex-boyfriend as a failed relationship, think of it as merely a practice run. Practice makes perfect, so long as you learn from it, so read these ten valuable lessons that you can learn from an ex-boyfriend.
1. Always say what’s on your mind
How many times have you said ‘nothing’ when a boyfriend has asked you what’s on your mind? Well, this might be one important lesson that you can learn from your trial runs with boyfriends. Always speak your mind and ask the questions that you want answered. Getting things out into the open clears the air and it lets you know exactly where you stand.
2. Don’t rush into things
Another thing that many people realise after a breakup is that sometimes, things are great, just as they are. It’s best to take your time with a relationship and don’t be too keen to rush it onto the next step. Enjoy the boyfriend/girlfriend stage, before you start rushing into marriage and thinking about kids.
3. Don’t accept any lies at all
While cheating is the ultimate lie, the smaller ones should not be ignored either. An important lesson that can be learned from any relationship is that trust matters and it matters a lot. Any kind of lying should be a complete no-no in a relationship and you really should learn from the experience and remember the saying: ‘Once bitten, twice shy’.
4. Don’t put all your eggs into one basket
We’re not talking about playing around here, but you should keep some of your independence and hang on to your own life. It can be devastating when you have made a boyfriend the be all and the end all of your life, only to be betrayed, so remember that everyone needs a life away from their partner too.
5. Don’t ignore the signs
People often ignore the signs that a relationship is going wrong, simply because they don’t want to believe it. A breakup can help you not make that same mistake again, so learn from the past and, the next time, be more aware of the signs and don’t ignore them. Pretending that all is right, when it’s not, won’t stop the inevitable, it will only delay it.
6. Give yourself a break
Exes can also teach you not to be so hard on yourself. Messy breakups can hurt and the most natural response is to wonder where you went wrong. When you take a more objective view of a split though, you can soon learn that it wasn’t your fault at all; it’s just what we call life.
7. You are important
Ex-boyfriends can also teach you how important it is to look after yourself. You can learn that you don’t have to be a in a partnership to make yourself your whole, you are an important individual in your own right.
8. You can’t change people
If you thought that you could change a man into the perfect partner, then a breakup will soon teach that you can’t. You have to love a person for whom they are, you can’t change them into what you want them to be. They may well pretend, for a while, but underneath the pretence, they will still be the same person they were when you first met.
9. You do have to talk about money
Money is the biggest causes of divorces and breakups, so it does have to be discussed. It’s not a fun thing to talk about, but if you’ve been in the situation where the finances have become a bone of contention, you will have learned how quickly money problems can destroy a relationship.
10. You learn to be stronger
Each and every time you get close to someone, you learn about people and you learn more about yourself. No relationship is truly wasted, so long as you learn from it and, with that learning, you become stronger and better able to handle the next relationship.