How To Stop Worrying? Most Things That You Fear Will Never Happen
“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which never happened.”
– Winston Churchill
People spend a lot of time worrying about things. In this article, Beauty and Tips takes a look at how to stop.
Most people will have worried about something at some point in their lives. But while some of us are very good at quickly overcoming apprehensions and forging on regardless, others are so paralysed by their worries that they find it impossible to act.
Perhaps you’ve been called a “worrier” by your friends. Perhaps you’ll admit that worry has stopped you from doing certain things that would have made you happier. And that’s really the reason people want to overcome worry: They no longer want it to control their lives, deciding what they can and can’t do.
As Winston Churchill so eloquently pointed out, many of us spend our time worrying about things that never happen anyway. If this sounds like you but you still can’t help worrying, let’s take a look at how to stop.
Before you do anything else, break off two squares of dark chocolate and eat it. While this is certainly not a magic cure for worry, it helps to settle your nerves.
Nip Things In The Bud Right Away
Worried about an unpaid tax bill?
Worried about having to go to a party you really didn’t want to go to?
Worried about breaking up with your partner?
A lot of the time, we bring our worries on ourselves – or make them a lot worse – by not nipping them in the bud sooner.
We say yes to a party even though we know we really don’t want to go to. We know we’re going to pretend we’re “sick” the day of the party to get out of it, and this impending lie causes us so much anxiety.
So why not make things so much easier by being more assertive? Say No to something you don’t want to do RIGHT AWAY. Don’t delay. Delaying your inevitable rejection will only make it harder for you to say No, and it will increase your worries. Take control of your life. Doing so will reduce the amount of worry you have.
For all the great things the Internet has done for the world – improved communication, connections and the way people earn a living – it’s also done some harm.
The Internet can easily fuel your worries if you let it. For example, a hypochondriac who is concerned about their health might pop online and Google their symptoms. Naturally, what they learn only exacerbates their concerns.
There is a lot of false information on the Internet and a lot of scaremongering. If you let it, the online world can easily make your anxiety get out of control.
Spend some time away from the Internet if possible. Stop Googling. Reassert some control and stop searching for “knowledge”.
Focus On What Can Go Right
So many of us focus on what can go wrong that we don’t even spend a moment thinking about what can go right. But, as strange as it may seem right now, things do actually go right!
When you picture things going right, not only do you put yourself in a more positive frame of mind that increases your chance of success, but you’re also practising visualisation, a proven technique for success.
Live In The Moment
When our worries escalate, it’s largely because we’re not living in the present moment. Instead, we’re living somewhere in the future. We’re predicting how event are going to turn out.
Let’s say you’ve got an important speech to give in front of people. Instead of focusing on what you need to say, you might find yourself picturing disaster happening on the day of the speech. Maybe you picture yourself sweating, forgetting your lines – or your skirt falling off on stage!
Lots of us picture worst case scenarios like this because we constantly live in the future.
Shift focus to the present day. Be mindful and live in the moment. Notice how you feel right now, as opposed to picturing how things might be in the future. Remember, it’s what you do now that decides your future – not your thoughts, worries and projections.
Remember That The Things You Worry About Usually Never Happen
Just as we said at the start of the article, it’s important that you come round to the realisation that most – if not all – the things you’ve ever spent days worrying about never even happen.
“But it might happen this time,” you argue.
It might – but the odds are stacked against it.
If you constantly live in the world of “might” you will eventually reach the age of the old man in Winston Churchill’s example with the sad realisation that “might” never happened.
Don’t be that old man, saddled with regret. Remember that our worries are almost always unfounded. Let that be your guide from now on.
Stop Second Guessing Other People
“He hasn’t texted me all day, he must be mad at me. Either that, or he’s met another woman.”
Sound familiar? How often do we try to act like mind-readers who know exactly what someone else is thinking? Who do we think we are?!
If someone doesn’t text us for a while, we automatically assume they’re annoyed with us.
Stop trying to figure out what’s going on in someone else’s mind. It’s a skill that’s beyond your power, and it’s only going to cost you time and worry. If you really want to know what someone else is thinking – ask them! Don’t torture yourself with your imagination. Otherwise, let what will be will be. You can’t control someone else’s mind anyway, so let them work things out for themselves.
Do you have other tips on how to stop worrying?