How to become happy and remain happy? Five tips
Happiness – we want it and we can’t get enough of it. For some reason, most of us tend to pay much more attention to the bad stuff that happens to them, than the good stuff. It’s not that most of us are pessimists, it’s probably because the bad stuff that happens to us can much more easily be turned into a valuable lesson. But we can learn just as much from happy moments, can’t we? We can learn how to generate more of these and how to change our perspective on life to make it better. Here are some more tips based on extensive scientific research. Scientists love studying happiness. After all, it’s the most important thing for everyone.
1. Get busy
You might think that you’d be happier if you had less work but, it seems, this is not the case. Busier people are happier people. There is, however, something of a catch. This only applies to people who are in jobs they enjoy. It’s a no-brainer, really – when you do something you like, time just flies and you don’t feel as tired and stressed, as when you have to do stuff you hate. This could give you some food for thought and maybe lead to some changes, couldn’t it? Especially when you consider that you’re far more likely to be successful when you do something you enjoy.
2. Love yourself
Another tip on how to become happy is to learn to love yourself. You can’t spend your whole life looking for happiness that comes from outside yourself. First, the world is not your servant. Second, you really deserve all the love you can give yourself. So, how do you stop harping on your physical imperfections or every small mistake you’ve made. What’s the point? We’re human, we all make mistakes. Then those among us who know how to be happy pick themselves up and go on. We are also all imperfect, yes, even the celebrities whose pictures you sigh over, wishing you looked just like that. Besides the imperfections, however, you are also full of nice features. Focus on those, they are always more than the imperfections.
Next tip on how to become happy is to change your focus. Most of the time we feel unhappy because we’re so focused on our problems, that we’re simply incapable of seeing anything beyond them. Why not try changing this focus a bit? Think of all the people who are in even worse situations and, despite that, some of them manage to keep an optimistic look on things. See? It’s not impossible, regardless of how serious your troubles are. If you think about it, there is just one thing that cannot be fixed and that’s death. Apart from it, everything, literally everything is fixable. That, by the way, includes the death of a relationship, so if you’re going through a difficult breakup, try to accept that it’s over, rather than thinking up ways to get him back. If it wasn’t meant to be, it wasn’t meant to be and that’s it. Your perfect match is in your future.
4. Lower the bar
One guaranteed way to become unhappy and stay unhappy is to want everything, rather than striving for only those things you can realistically have. Being able to accept the fact that you will probably never live in a 50-room mansion (unless you win the lottery and that’s a huge if) will make you a lot happier, than if you invest time in complaining about the studio flat that you’re sharing with a friend. Why not get a new, better-paid job instead and get the money to move into a bigger place? Setting yourself realistic goals is one key to happiness. Being satisfied with what you already have is another. And here’s an interesting thing: the more unrealistic your goals, the higher the risk of failure, have you ever thought about this? The consequence: you feel miserable because you failed, even though common sense should have told you that failure was the only logical outcome. Maybe it did, actually, but you chose not to listen to it. Next time do. In short: want what you can get, otherwise you’ll never have what you want.
5. Take the reins
Psychologists studying happiness have found that the people who feel that they have control over their lives are significantly happier than those among us who go through life with the feeling that everything is out of their hands. Naturally, no person can control everything that happens to them. Those who try to do this are usually labelled control freaks and are much more stressed than the rest of us. Yet, we’re not talking about extremes here. We’re talking about controlling what you can, such as the choice of a job or a relationship. In fact, save for the weather and most other people, you can control everything, because you have a choice in every single situation, every day. Incidentally, while you’re taking the reins of your life in your own hands, it would be wise to forget about that worst of all questions: “What will people say?” This is definitely not something you should care about, honestly. Do you constantly think about what other people that you don’t know are doing and why? No?! Exactly, so stop worrying about what people will say.
How to become happy and remain happy? What are your best tips?