10 Tips That Will Help You Let Go More Easily
We’d all love to be able to let go easily and move on fast so that we can get on with our lives. In this article, Beauty and Tips takes a look at how to do just that.
People always say to us that we should let the past be the past. But how easy is it to actually do that?
Especially when we feel a strong emotional connection to the past, letting go and moving on can be the most difficult of things.
And you know what? Dwelling on the past is totally okay. It’s fine to do that. you’re a human being, and it’s natural to take some time to heal. Grief is an important part of the recovery process.
But when the past begins to stop you from moving forward, this is when it becomes an issue.
A lot of the time, we don’t even make the attempt to let go. For example, perhaps each year we dread the autumn because it has painful memories for us. Instead of making an attempt to let go, we brace ourselves each year for the autumn, and just do our best to get through it.
But you know how much this is hurting you.
Let’s take a look at 10 tips that will help you to let go more easily.
Set Aside A Dwell Time
This might seem like a strange piece of advice in an article about letting go of our past, as opposed to dwelling on it.
But right now, it’s likely that you’re dwelling on your past too much. It’s hard for you to let go of. As such, it isn’t possible to suddenly go cold turkey and move on. There needs to be some time to reflect.
As such, we recommend that you set aside a brief period of time each night to dwell. Give yourself, say, 30 minutes. Don’t allow yourself anymore than that.
Then, once the 30 minutes are up, force yourself to get on with the rest of your day or night.
It’s very important that you do this, as it instills discipline. Instead of focusing on the past uncontrollably, you know that you’ve got a restriction, and that going beyond that restriction will cost you more lost time.
Focus On What Can Be Controlled
A lot to the time, us humans are very good at focusing on what can’t be controlled, as opposed to what can be controlled.
This is where we go wrong, and this is when anxiety creeps in.
Learn to quit focusing on the stuff that’s out of your hands, and shift focus to that what you can manage.
Learn To Forgive
A major reason why we sometimes can’t move on from the past is that we just aren’t ready to forgive.
The thing with forgiveness is that it’s not a case of letting the other person off the hook. When you forgive someone, you’re not granting them a pardon while you yourself continue to be burdened by the pain and the memories.
Instead, in forgiving someone you’re bringing yourself some much-needed closure. You’re calling an end to the pain, cutting ties with the person and moving on.
You don’t need to move on immediately. But there comes a time when it’s sensible to forgive and get on with your life.
Vent – And Move On
We all need to vent. Denying ourselves the chance to vent means we never fully move on from a situation – at least not properly.
So vent. Have a rant! Scream and shout. Hate on your past.
Now that it’s out of your system, you can move forward.
Find What Matters To You
Another reason we can’t always let go of the past is that we just haven’t found something else to replace the hole in our lives with.
If each day you haven’t found a new passion that takes up your time and which you actually enjoy, then of course it’s going to be hard to get off the sofa and live your life.
We all need something awesome that motivates us each day to get out of bed and win. Maybe it’s time to find yours again. Look for your passion. Find what motivates you, and shift your focus to it.
We’re not suggesting for one minute that any of this was your fault. But ask yourself which parts were your fault.
Then, take responsibility for it.
Doing this can not only bring closure, but it also shows you where you went wrong. As such, you can make improvements so that it doesn’t happen again.
Write Down What’s Bothering You
We all have demons in our closet, some of which we can’t get rid of. And it’s when we can’t get rid of them that they take over our day to day life.
To properly bury your past, you could actually bury it for real.
What do we mean by this?
Write down what’s bothering you. Write it down on a piece of paper. Write it all down. Get it off your chest.
Then, bury the piece of paper.
Or, if you think that burning the piece of paper would be more cathartic, do that instead.
Sounds too crazy to work? Try it!
Remember That We All Make Mistakes
Having a hard time moving on because someone made a mistake? Perhaps it was a big mistake. That’s fine. We understand how upset you are.
But it’s important to remember that we all make mistakes.
For a moment, put yourself in their shoes and see things from their perspective.
We’re not saying what they did was right, but it’s important that you can understand how human they are, and that not everything has a malicious motive.
Take The Positives
Out of any experience there are positives to take. Find the positives from this one and hold them close to you.
Build New Relationships
As you try to move on from the past, there will be people around you who are trying to help you move on. Perhaps you haven’t noticed them, because you’ve been so caught up in your thoughts and anxieties.
That’s totally ok. But now is the time to start noticing them.
Build your relationships with people. Build new ones. Reciprocate the kindness people have shown you recently. Do something nice for other people. Immerse yourself in their lives for once, but do so in such a way that your own life improves as a result.