10 Tips on How to Help Your Husband When He Is Stressed
Stress is a common problem, for both men and women, but it is men who are more likely to bottle up stress and pretend that nothing is wrong. That’s why it can be important to recognise when your partner is suffering from stress and to be able to do something about it. If your husband is starting to show the signs of stress, here are ten things that you can do help him through it.
1. Give him a chance to chill out
If someone is struggling with problems at work, they will want to be able to come home and relax and not be immediately hit with a lot more problems that need solving. That doesn’t mean that you should take everything onto your own shoulders, or pretend that there is nothing that needs to be discussed. Just give him an hour’s chill out time when he first gets home, though, so he can wind down before he tackles the home issues.
2. Talk to him
It can be tough getting a guy to talk about his problems, but if you know that there is something troubling him, you can least let him know that you are there for him if he needs you. Ask him what is wrong and ask him if there is anything you can do to help. There is every chance that he will tell you nothing is wrong, but give him time, and then he will talk about it with you when he is ready.
3. Be patient with him
Many people get irritable and short tempered when they are stressed, and that can be tough to cope with, but try to be patient with him and give him some space. Of course, no one has to put up with any kind of abusive behaviour, but if his behaviour is unusual and you know it’s being caused by stress, this might be the one time you need to avoid snapping back at him if he has been a bit curt with you.
4. Ask him for help
Giving your husband a job to do when he is already under stress may seem a strange idea, but asking him to do something for you will take his mind off what it is that is causing the stress. It will also show him that work is not his only concern and that you need him as well. The best type of thing to ask him to do you for would be something that it is totally unrelated work. Asking your accountant husband, for example, to check over your credit card statement, is not going to give him much of a break!
5. Take him out for the evening
Treating your man to a nice meal out will help him relax and take his mind off things. When a person is stressed, a change of scenery or a break from the routine can be a real morale booster and a way to unwind. A meal out is also the perfect opportunity to try to get him to open up and discuss his problems with you.
6. Stay positive
Even if he is moping around and being decidedly miserable, if you stay positive and upbeat, that will help lift him out of his bad mood. Positivity and fun will definitely rub off, so if you keep smiling, he will smile eventually too.
7. Invite some of his friends over
Letting him hang out with his friends will help him to relax too, so encourage him to go out, or invite some of his friends over. Dealing with stress is about not letting it become the biggest thing in your life. Being with his friends is another way that he might see that there is a lot more to life than just the one problem that he is getting stressed out about.
8. Show him that there are options
A big cause of stress is feeling trapped. A lot of men still feel the need to be a provider, which makes their work far more important to them, perhaps, it should be. You could lift some of his stress by simply pointing out to him that he could quit his job and you’d still, between you, be able to manage. That will show him that the burden is shared and that he does, always, have choices.
9. Let him sleep if he wants to
Sleepless nights are often quoted as one of the symptoms of stress, but so too is crashing out on the sofa when you get home! Quite obviously this would not be ideal in the long term, but when he is under a lot of stress, let him get his sleep when he can, because sleep is essential if he is going to be able to cope with the stress.
10. Make love
Some people who are under stress will lose their appetite for sex completely, so if your husband’s libido has disappeared, you shouldn’t force it, or you will make him feel even more inadequate and stressed. However, if you can get him interested, lovemaking will provide a welcome release for him and he might even be able to get a proper night’s sleep afterward.