How To Be More Confident On A Date?
Heading out on a first date is meant to be really exciting, but it can also be really nerve-wracking. In this article, we’re going to take a look at a few ways you can be more confident on a date.
You know that feeling just minutes before you meet your date? There are butterflies fluttering in your stomach. Your heart is beating fast. You’re excited but scared. You check yourself one more time in the mirror to make sure you look good; you inhale and exhale.
You look good. You’re well prepared. But you still lack confidence.
Going into a first date without confidence can spell disaster. You may end up saying things you later regret, and you might not come across as someone he could really dig.
But it’s okay. It’s totally normal to be nervous on a first date. The good news? Anyone can learn to master self-confidence. Let’s take a look at how you can rock up to a first date full of confidence so that you get exactly what you want out of this.
So many of us go into things – including dates – with a negative mindset. How many times the night before something important have you pictured things going wrong?
“It’s human nature,” you might argue. But actually? It isn’t human nature. You can start to flip this around and picture what can go right. And if you do, you’ll certainly have more confidence.
Try it. Picture yourself turning up to the date looking amazing. All eyes are on you. You meet the guy – who, by the way, looks great too – and he compliments you on your hair and dress.
And your conversation is on fire. You impress him with your wit and intelligence. By the end of the evening, he’s so smitten that he wants a second date.
How does this make you feel?
Spend less time thinking about what can go wrong and more time thinking about what can go right.
Initiate The Date
You know a great way to be more confident on a date? Be the person who initiates the date. Don’t wait around for him to make his move. You make the move first. This automatically puts you in a confident mindset. You’ve taken charge, taken responsibility.
You’re also showing the guy who confident you are, and this is a very powerful thing.
By initiating the date, you’ve already risked rejection. The biggest hurdle has already been overcome. It’s not all plain sailing from here, but once you get a Yes from him, your confidence levels will sky-rocket.
Just Be Yourself
It’s tempting to read self-help books that help you to be more confident on dates. They teach you about body language, what to say, et cetera.
And maybe you rehearse a few things to say on your date. Maybe you recite a joke over in your head that you’re going to use on him.
The problem with all this is that it can put pressure on you to play a certain role. You’re too busy rehearsing lines and body language that you forget to just be yourself.
Being yourself on a date is so important for confidence. Why? Because this is a role you’ve played for so many years already! You can easily slip into it. You know your script off by heart. Casting yourself in a different role moments before you head out on a date only adds unnecessary pressure, and it can make you stumble and fluff your lines.
Talk About Your Accomplishments
Humility is a good trait, while self-deprecation can be fun. But talking about your achievements in life is a great way to build your self-confidence. Let him know what you’re good at and most proud of. It will empower you.
Don’t Say Too Much
The minute we start rambling about things we have little knowledge of is the moment we undermine our own self-confidence. Keep the conversations on topics you know well. If he asks you for your thoughts on something you have no experience in, just politely say you can’t provide an answer.
Keep your anecdotes and jokes tight, too. Try not to say so much that you end up losing your train of thought and your stories veer off into dead-ends. It can be really awkward and it can further undermine your confidence. Be fun, friendly and chatty but know when to stop. If you say too much, you might say something you later regret.
“Why did I say that?! OMG!!”
Wear Something You Know You Look Good In
A really easy way of knocking yourself out of your stride on a first date is by wearing something brand new that you just don’t feel right in.
You look at yourself side-on in the mirror and you can see your stomach. Worse still, you bum looks SO big.
Unfortunately, you’ve ran out of time and have to leave the house now. But you don’t feel confident because you’re not wearing something you feel comfortable in. Disaster!
Keep it simple and casual for a first date. Slip on an old number you already know you look good in. It will make you feel comfortable and confident.
Definitely don’t feel pressured to wear something fancy. It’s not worth compromising your comfort for it. Just wear what makes you feel happy.
Don’t Massively Worry About Impressing Him
Of course it would be nice if your date likes you and wants a second date. But you know what? It’s not the end of the world if he doesn’t like you.
Look, if you go into a date obsessing over trying to impress him so that he really, REALLY likes you, you might crumble under the pressure. Instead, remind yourself that you, since you both planned to meet, there must be something he already likes about you. Use this as your reference and just take it easy. Don’t make a song or a dance about how much he likes you. If he likes you, fab! If he doesn’t, no big deal. You move on.