9 Tips on how to build your confidence with guys 

Historically, guys always took the lead when it came to looking for a prospective partner and a woman who approached a man was even considered to be being forward and improper. But things change, and we are on an equal footing now, but, that doesn’t help you if you find it difficult talking to men. If you lack confidence when you are talking to the guys, then have a read of our nine tips on how to build up that confidence and make approaching guys a bit easier:

1. Know that, at the end of the day, men and women come from the same planet

Our first tip on how to build confidence with guys is – rethink how you view men. Start by stopping your thoughts that guys are some kind of mysterious breed coming from Mars, that are completely different from girls who come from Venus. Yes, there are some fairly obvious differences and some a little more subtle, but underneath everything else, we are all human beings and have the same kind of feelings. Try not to see the stereotypical man when you look at a guy, he is just another human being. After all, you can easily talk to the girls and they are human beings, so why not guys?

2. Friendship is always a good start

Our next tip on how to build confidence with guys is – know that friendship is a good start. When there is no possibility of anything but a friendship with another person, you don’t feel any pressure at all, but bring in the possibility of relationships and intimacy, and you probably start to feel the pressure piling on. When you first meet any man, whether or not you would like things to get more serious, start by just aiming for friendship and it will make things a lot easier. Sit back, make friends, if it develops further – good, if not – it’s no great shakes, just value his friendship then.

3. Unless you are an Oscar winning actress, always be yourself!

Pretending to be someone that you are not is not easy, unless you are an Oscar winning actress. Even the best actors get stage fright, so it’s no surprise if you get nervous putting on an act. Just be yourself, just as you would be, if you were talking to a girl friend of yours and your own true personality and your natural charm will see you through.

4. Don’t try so hard to impress him!

Another tip on how to build confidence with guys is – avoid the pressure of trying to make an impression. If he doesn’t like you, then that’s his loss! Trying too hard to impress will just make you more nervous or it will make you appear desperate, which isn’t usually attractive…That’s why most of us hate job interviews, because we are trying to make an impression, so just relax, smile and chat with him, as you would with anyone else; it will make things easy and if there is a true connection between the two of you, then things will flow naturally.

5. Put in some practice

Practice makes perfect, so our next tip on how to build confidence with guys is – get used to chatting with men in a non-threatening environment first. You can start by trying to make small talk with some of the guys at work. Learn a bit more about what makes men tick and you’ll find that they’re not really that different from girls.

6. Just changing the way you stand can make you feel more confident

One of the easiest tips on how to build confidence with guys is – improve your posture. If you put your head down, slouch and try to ‘hide’, you will actually feel less confident, than you really are. Think about your posture. Stand with your back straight and your head held high, and you will start to feel the confidence surge through you.

7. Get out of your comfort zone and join in the conversation

Remember, the most nerve wracking part of a conversation is your first sentence, after that it gets a whole lot easier. If you are in a group setting and it feels like you are not involved, then try and just get a word or two in and you will be amazed at how quickly people will start including you in the conversation, even the guys!

8. There is only one you on this planet, so don’t compare yourself with others, love yourself instead

There is no point in making comparisons between yourself and others, because there is only one of you. You are unique, beautiful and that’s all that counts, so instead of worrying about what some other girl is wearing or how she’s done her hair, remember your own qualities and have faith in them, this is another important tip on how to build confidence with guys. You are marvelous, great, unique, wonderful and there is only one you on this planet! Remember it always!

9. …Remember, guys love talking to girls!

And our final tip for you, if you are not confident talking to guys, just remember that guys, as a matter of fact, love it when a girl starts to talk to them, it gives their own confidence a huge boost! So don’t be worried about it, they want to talk to you!

How to build confidence with guys? Do you have some other tips? Please, feel free to share them in the comment section below.

Stay beautiful, happy and be confident!


  1. Alessandra Martellacci
    March 29, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    Thank you for the reminder that women and men are the same species. In a world deeply polarized on ‘gender issues’ it’s refreshing to be reminded that we are all human.

  2. Lawrence
    March 25, 2014 at 6:41 am

    Wonderful confidence tips! Thank you for encouraging us to love ourselves more…Best regards!

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