10 Things Mature Men Don’t Do
Feeling somewhat disillusioned by the men in your life? Here 10 things mature men don’t do.
Recently, I was watching an episode of a popular American reality TV show. I’ve never been massively into reality television, but one night I was bored and feeling low, so I decided to “escape” into something that was supposedly fun and easygoing. However, I was horrified by the behaviour of some of the male contestants. They were lurid, loud and disrespectful.
Unfortunately, they are not necessarily exceptions to the rule. Last year, my friend dated an arrogant chauvinist who would have made my granddads blood boil. He was rude, not just to her but also to her friends. Are there many other men out there like him? Unfortunately, there are.
Some men just haven’t learned how to grow up. They don’t know what it means to have some respect. They don’t know what it means to be confident, kind and caring. All they really care about is themselves. They’re in it for themselves, and they don’t care who they hurt along the way.
And because they’re so loud, they make it hard for us to spot the mature guys. If you’ve sworn to never date an immature man ever again, here are 10 things mature men don’t do.
They Don’t Let Fear Rule Their Lives
Immature men are guys that haven’t yet grown up. And a big part of growing up is learning how to accept your fears, before overcoming them.
Mature men are not held back by fear. They have fears – of course they do. But they first acknowledge the fear in question, before setting about how to conquer it.
Immature men live in bubbles where they don’t have to confront failure. They never reach beyond their potential because they don’t want to be embarrassed. They’re scared of rejection, in both their personal and professional lives.
If a mature man wants you, he will let you know as eloquently as possible. He WON’T dart around the issue, pretending he doesn’t need you. He will spell out to you exactly what you mean to him. Why? Because he isn’t scared of your answer.
They Don’t Avoid Talking About The Future
Ever tried talking about the future to an immature guy? It’s impossible. He avoids it at all costs. He’s either tired, the super bowl is on, or he’s got a really annoying scratch (seriously).
They Don’t Go Out All The Time
Yes, even mature men like to go out now and then and enjoy themselves. They’re not total bores.
But they don’t go out all the time like they did when they were 19. They’ve calmed down. They recognise their responsibilities, and they love their new life with you.
They Don’t Harbour Grudges
URGH. I hate it when guys take something personally and turn it into a big deal. One time, I genuinely accidentally forgot to reply to a guy’s cute text message. Yes, he’d taken his time to write it, and yes, it was cute. And yes, I didn’t respond for 24 hours because I forgot about it. And yes, I was making Facebook statuses during that time.
But you know what he did? He ghosted me – deliberately – for the next 24 hours. That’s what immature guys do.
Mature guys don’t. They accept you made a mistake and move on immediately.
They Don’t Put Their Friends First
“Hey can’t see you tonight got beer pong with the guys xxx”.
That’s not what a mature guy would ever do. You are always his priority.
They’re Not Here Just To Please Other People
What do you think it means when someone goes out of their way to do this and that for other people so that they’re liked? Does it mean that they’re likeable and nice? Or does it mean that they’re pushovers who aren’t mature enough to set their own goals and work toward them?
Mature men don’t do things just to please you or anyone else. They do the things they actually WANT to do.
If a mature man is eating healthily and working out, it’s because he wants to be healthy. He isn’t doing it for the juvenile reason of impressing someone else. He is capable of making his own decisions that he knows will improve his life.
They Don’t Idealise Women
You’ll know how immature a guy is when you fail to meet the lofty and frankly insane idealised image that he had of you. He pictured you as being absolutely perfect, inside, outside, and in the bedroom. And when you don’t live up to those expectations, when you (god forbid) show him that you’re actually human, he turns into a full-on misogynist.
The guy who hasn’t grown up yet fails to realise that mature men fall in love with a woman’s flaws – they are not repelled by them. The mature man knows that women have both strengths and weaknesses. They know we have faults, and they’re willing to overlook them or help us with them. They’re realistic. They know we’re as human as they are.
Their Dreams Aren’t Insane
Sure, we’ve all gotta have dreams. But mature men are mature enough to know their limits and chase dreams they know they can achieve.
Unlike those guys who say they’re gonna be millionaires but who still haven’t woken up before noon yet.
They Don’t Get Confused Because We, Girls, Are Different To Them
Not gonna lie, women get snappy. You know this. We get moody and, especially when our period is on its way, we can even get a bit monstrous.
Yes, I’ve ripped a guys head off once or twice.
But, hey. You know what? Women are different to guys. We react differently, communicate differently. We are affected by things differently. We cry way more than guys and, yes, probably get angrier more than guys.
Mature men know this. They understand the whole “women are from venus, men are from mars” line because it’s true. Rather than get confused or even stroppy, they talk to us about it.
Or just leave us alone to finish our crying session off.
They Don’t Run Away From Issues
If there is an issue in the relationship, the mature guy is always ready and willing to talk about it. He wants to sort it as soon as possible, so that your future goes smoothly. Mature man does’t run away from problems, he confronts them and finds solutions.