10 Conversation Ideas For Your First Date
The first date is always a bit of a nail-biter. Will he still be interested in you now that he’s met you in person? Will there be tense, awkward moments of horrible silence? Will you know what to talk about?
I used to be a serial dater when I was younger. Not because I was addicted to dating or anything! It was more because I found it really hard to meet the right guy.
If there is something I picked up during all those dates it’s how to perfect the art of conversation with someone you’ve never met before but find attractive.
First of all, it’s important that you turn up well-prepared. Always have ideas in your head for topics you could potentially bring up. This way, you’ve always got something to save the day when it looks as though an awful silence is about to take over.
Secondly, choose the right setting. A noisy bar isn’t going to do you any favours – if anything, it will put you both off saying much at all. And when you do say something, he might struggle to hear you. It’s a real conversation killer.
Let’s take a look at 10 great conversation ideas for your first date.
Talk About Best Friends
I love to find out about my dates best friend, because it can tell you a lot about who they are as a person. After all, we tend to judge someone by the company the keep. Learning more about who their best friend is and why can give you more insights into who you’re dating.
There is always an interesting story behind why people became best friends, too. Moreover, there are always funny anecdotes to relate about what you and your best friend have got up to in the past. So listen to him about his best friend and then tell him about yours.
Talk About Movies
I know that not everyone is passionate about movies. I have a friend who says she hates to talk about them, especially on dates. But we all have a go-to movie whenever we’re feeling down, and I always like to talk about this on a first date.
Mine is Reality Bites because it always raises my spirits after a bad day. I love the characters and how they’re just trying to make sense of adulthood, and I also cherish the memories I have attached to this movie. What’s your go-to movie, and what’s your dates?
Talk About Your Day
This might sound cliched but it works because it establishes commonalities. Everyone did something, and it’s likely that you two did something you can both relate to.
Talk About Goals
Talking about goals is a good conversation topic if you want to find out where your date is heading in life. Goals give us direction and purpose, and they can tell you two whether you are compatible or not.
For example, if your goals are wildly different, it might tell you straight away that this isn’t really going to go anywhere. I went on a date once with a guy who told me that his plan was to start a family in “five to ten years’ time”. My plan was to start one within a year.
As well as giving you an idea as to how compatible you two are, talking about goals is also fascinating and can lead to more topics.
What gets him excited about vacation time? Is he a beach bum, a culture vulture or a thrill seeker?
Talk About Families
I don’t know about you, but I’m very family-oriented and I prefer it if my boyfriend is too. I want to date a guy who is mad about his mom and treats her well.
I think families are a really cute topic to talk about on a first date. Naturally, this topic is out-of-bounds if your date hasn’t seen his family for ten years or something, but if you’ve already tested the waters in messages and know that he still sees his family, bringing up this topic always works on a first date. Everyone loves to talk about their families, and there’s always a funny story to tell about dad (mine was the time my dad locked himself in the bathroom to dye his hair, only to leave traces of black liquid all over the sink afterwards. We knew what he’d been up to!!).
So, talk about families and prepare a funny story or two beforehand.
Talk About Bad Dates
You don’t want to talk about ex’s. But you should talk about bad dates. This topic always gets people laughing.
Talk About Secrets
If you think the time is ripe to get a bit closer to each other, the best way to do it is by sharing secrets. This quickens up the getting-to-know-each-other process hugely.
Talk About Things You Care Strongly About
Okay, this is a slightly serious topic that you should only broach on a first date if you know he can handle it and doesn’t mind discussing serious matters.
What I mean by things that you care strongly about are things that you believe in with conviction. For example, it could be animal welfare or climate change.
This is a topic I only bring up if I know the conversation is heading in that direction. It’s not exactly light-hearted, but it’s revealing and instructive, and it can help you decide if it’s worth going on a second date.
Talk About Weekends
Weekends are so much fun. It’s likely if you both work regular jobs that you get weekends off. So it’s kinda important that you know how each other prefers to spend their weekends so that if this first date works out, the two of you know for sure whether or not you’d be able to spend weekends together.
For example, last year I went on a date with a guy who still enjoyed going out partying on Saturday nights. It surprised me as he hadn’t given any indication about this in our messages. And because my party days are very much behind me, it all but meant that there was no point seeing each other again. While I like to get up and do stuff on a Sunday morning, he would still be in bed cursing his hangover.